Research is now showing that one of the longest lasting paybacks of money spent and time spent is the making of memories. In other words, that new pair of shoes or gadget or whatcha-ma-thingey may be enjoyable. But spending time doing something, going somewhere, having shared experiences has a generally higher payback in satisfaction. This is especially true over the long term.
Now you may say, well I can’t afford to go on big, expensive vacations all of the time. Or even some of the time. Good news, it’s not relative to the money spent. It’s not even necessarily about the place. It doesn’t have to be Hawaii or Europe. It’s based on your experience, whether alone or with someone. It’s about actually being in the moment and experiencing what is going on. It’s about those shared experiences, both good and bad that make for memories and stories. In fact, as you probably know, sometimes the unexpected makes for the best stories later.
I was really thinking about that this past weekend as we celebrated our countries birthday. My adult kids were far away but I got to spend it with my mom. I remembered (and missed)) all of the fun times when we got to set off our own fireworks. I especially remember the unusual things. Like my younger son’s potato gun. One year he attached those light-up bracelets to the potatoes; you could see them flying through the night sky. Another year, I made good on my promise to my sons that they could “blow up” a watermelon. These were times we also got to share with friends.
The actual activities were great fun. But I also re-experience that joy and laughter every time I think about it, as do the others involved. What an investment. It wasn’t a great deal of money, it was the fun and uniqueness of the experience. Plus the anticipation of waiting for the event.
So this weekend, as I am preparing to move out of town, far away from my mother, I wanted to make some really special memories. I wanted some things we could hold onto in our hearts, till the next time we are together.
My mom did her part, cooking all kinds of our favorite foods. The bonus was two nights of fabulous fireworks. When my mom moved into her new apartment, it had an extra bonus. She has a huge picture window that faces the local minor league baseball field. They had home games Sunday and Monday. They also have the tradition of a big fireworks show after the game, two nights this year!
So after eating all kinds of our favorite foods, we pulled our chairs up to the window, turned out the lights and shared our own private show, with all the comforts of home! Having two nights made it even more special. And that memory didn’t cost us a thing. The show was free. We would have eaten anyway. Others were doing the same, all around the building were families sitting on the grass.
I know this will be a memory that will bring a smile and a laugh for years. It was a moment for us that was, as they say “priceless.”
Another memory that sticks very clearly for me, and brings a chuckle every time, was being in a burger joint together as a family. We were sitting in a tight booth, drinking our tea and waiting anxiously for our number to come up. We’d been to this place before. It was out of town so was a special treat for us.
Suddenly, someone knocked over a full to the rim, giant glass of icy, iced full tea. And time went into slow motion. We were all locked into the brown lake flowing unstoppably across the slick table. Toward me. To my lap. No napkins available. No way to move out of the way, in the crowded booth. No way to stop it. Stuck in slow motion. And suddenly, I had a lap full of 24 ounces of brrrrrrrrrr!
We must have yelled as we saw it happening, unable to intervene, because as I looked around, many in the restaurant were staring watching this icy scene. All eyes had turned on me to see how I would react. I wish I could say I always reacted this well. This time, I was struck with shear humor in the situation. So as everyone sucked in a breath waiting. I burst into laughter! It really was the funniest thing I’d ever seen. If I’d seen this on Saturday Night Live, I would have loved it, so might as well join in. Needless to say, as I started laughing, my kids and my husband’s faces rocketed into smiles and laughter. The others in the restaurant joined in. We all had a great, if very cold, time. And now I had a great story, we had a memory.
Those memories are the marking stones of remembrance that help- us map out the time passing. And reassures us that we will did take the time to be fully in the moment, experiencing it and those around us. Live your life as a memory maker in the On mode.
What’s your favorite memory? Was it planned or an “accident”?